Back story. Who has one? One of my lessons has been to remember no one is handed a get out of jail free card here. And I think it changes my focus when I remember that the woman across from me has her own story. Perhaps they involve any or all of the following. This is not a comprehensive list but just a start:
Betrayal
Cancer
Abuse
Loneliness
Loss
Addiction
Isolation
Mental illness
Depression
Divorce
Failure
Family of origin wounds.
The loss could manifest itself in so many ways. Loss of job, spouse, dreams, and hopes.
Even if our friend appears strong, brave, and together, if unhealed emotional wounds are not tended to, any small poke can hurt. And we behave like a brat perhaps.
My friend and I giggled as we remembered Paul Harvey’s words-“ and now you know the rest of the story.”
So when the clerk, waitress, friend, or sister snaps, could we re-frame the encounter. What in her is wounded and what needs healing. Could we pray, ask, and reach out. Maybe even offer accountability. Or just plain let it go. Some encounters are short lived but most I just know are God ordained. And what in us needs work. I’m thankful for every crazy, hard lesson. I’m committed to the work. I’m committed to friends that know the counselor appointment will breath life. Eventually. So many tools out there. Heart to hearts. Scripture. Prayer. Whole foods. Exercise. Fresh Air. Healing rest. Yoga. Meditation. Experiencing God. Prophetic words. Community. CHURCH.
The Lord has clearly asked me to share my stories. It’s part of my curriculum. He recently had someone tell me not to dare censor them. If you can relate at all to what I write then He gets the victory. If it pokes you, believe me it slapped me in the face first. No one is required to read, agree, like, or comment. It’s just here to start me thinking and keep me on course.
Am I wrong? Does your back story filter your response and reaction? Do you hear the comment in someone else’s voice?
Who is responsible for our reaction? Even if others around are unaware of your gut reaction, is it their responsibility to intervene. I’m working on boundaries and any codependent behavior I may have unaware. It affects my responses I know. It’s so easy to blame anyone but ourselves. Or take on too much blame. Ugh. Hard stuff.
So when an encounter goes down, take a deep breath. I want to show up and serve. Show love. I certainly have failed. But I won’t give the enemy the satisfaction of giving up. People need our stories friends. The world would have us think that all Christians have it all perfected. And if not they have failed. I’m here to tell you this one does not. But I know where the power, healing, and freedom comes from. Let’s focus on the kingdom more instead of each other. At least as far as blame is concerned. And let’s point each other home.
Climb the mountain and shout from the top. Consider it a huge gift to share and to hear. The Bible is full of crazy stories that went down in history to save the world.
The Heart to Heart Ministry here at Cheerful Hearts is on Revamp and we are adding “telling your story” as a major improvement. The tool we will mainly be using, although we will use several, will be LISTEN TO MY LIFE: Maps for Recognizing and Responding to God in My Story by Sibyl Towner and Sharon Swing. Hilda has gotten to know Sibyl Towner through her Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership Program, and is very excited about adding this component.
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